snoocher
Do we have your attention? Good, now listen up. Have you ever considered becoming a Mormon? If not, you may want to reconsider especially if you want to more easily transcend into Executive Leadership territory and even…beyond.
As a Mormon, you’re dressed for work anyways.
As a Mormon, you never leave the house looking disheveled. The Mormon dress code states:
Boys won’t have overly baggy pants that reveal underwear and waistlines won’t hang low. They also have their shoulders, stomachs, and chests covered and their clothing is designed to cover them, not reveal them. Neither group will have tattoos.
https://www.businessinsider.com/mormon-dress-code-2014-3
These guidelines are pretty generic, but I think you’ll find most LDS members dress more business casual, giving them a big leg up against the competition!
Your Mormon buddies will help you land your first job.
“Birds of a shitfeather flock together Randy.” – Jim Lahey
While the quote may seem a bit strange, it is oddly fitting. The truth is, if you’re Mormon, your Mormon buddies are always going to be there to help you out. It is a nice perk to have when it comes to landing your first job. Just show up to your job interview with the “Book of Mormon” in tow, and the job is yours!
If your boss is Mormon, you’ll be in the fast-lane for underserved promotions and leadership roles.
As long as you show mediocre performance and marginal knowledge of your career field, you’re golden. See, your fellow Mormons just need to see that you’re trying somewhat hard at your job. You may not be an expert, you may not even consider yourself qualified, but hey it doesn’t matter. You’re Mormon, and that’s what counts my friend. Being under-qualified and overpaid is in your blood, just embrace it with silent satisfaction.
Mormon welfare is the bees knees.
Hey, we all fall on hard times. If you’re Mormon, don’t sweat it. The Church has an extensive welfare program. You’ll be in much better shape than the rest of those normal government welfare “peasants” out there.
Even in the afterlife, you’ll be in upper management.
If you’re a good Mormon and follow the scripture as it is written, you’ll transcend into the “Celestial Kingdom” for an eternity of mid-to-upper level leadership positions in the afterlife. Sounds like a sweet gig!
