A new study completed this past July from the Arizona State University School of Mathematical and Statistical Sciences has solved a long standing math problem. Stanley Mays, a member of the faculty at ASU, has been working in mathematical academia for 25 years with a doctorate in mathematics and computer science. During a brief interview with Mays he said, “I’ve dedicated my research to math because it’s such a beautiful elegant description of the world such as the fractals of geography or internet porn traffic,” then he inhaled a line of coke off his desk in his office. Mays has reportedly been working on the P vs NP problem stated by the Clay Mathematics Institute in 2000 which offers a one million dollar prize for a solution to this problem as well as six others. “I lost so many nights of sleep laboring over this problem when I had an epiphany at 2 in the morning. Of course, Drugs! Drugs are the answer!” he slurred out. Mays says he will continue working on the other 6 Millennium Prize Problems and is going to attend EDC Las Vegas in 2018 to, “roll my face off”.
University Mathematician Discovers That Drugs Are the Answer
